Santa's Wap. UGH.

One might think that this is the year when I would look forward to sitting on Santa's lap. Not so! I don't want to sit on Santa's wap! I don't want it! But I do want a wizard (lizard) for Christmas. And I told him as much when I saw him. He was sitting in a big fat chair in the basement of a mall and I was riding up the escalator (away from him, thankfully). Realizing that this might be my only chance, I yelled it to him on my way up the escalator. "Santa!! I WANT A WIZARD!!" I hope he heard me.